Gross. Just gross.

What the fuck, dude? I just found out that there are entire BDSM websites dedicated to exploring “cervical dilation.” As anyone who’s ever had a gynecological exam can tell you, having your cervix fucked with is the worst feeling in the goddamned world. And dilating it can allow bacteria from the vaginal canal into the uterus, which can cause all kinds of insane infections, which can lead to PID, which can lead to infertility. Fucking sick. I’m sorry, but if anyone tries to tell me they enjoy cervical dilation, I’m going to have to assume they’ve lost the plot.

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62 thoughts on “Gross. Just gross.

  1. Oooooooooh gross. Isn’t part of the hell of birth the fact that your cervix takes forever to dilate? That’s with all the natural hormones and because it’s completely necessary otherwise your cervix would, y’know, explode. I don’t even want to think about how they force it to dilate. Then… what do they do when it’s dilated? AAAAAH distracting myself with cartoons now.


  2. On a very gross related note, I discovered long ago that the Japanese use of animation to draw sexual fetishes that are not achievable by the mere human woman (as opposed to the pre-teen sexbots of pedophile man-boy fantasy) extends to a genre called “cross sections”. Prominently featured within this aptly named fetish is barely anatomical diagrams of men’s freakishly long cocks occupying a vagina of a young (think illegally young) girl. Since she is so young, the cock has nowhere to go but—you guessed it—her uterus. This is accompanied by the usual flash to her dazed and half-conscious visage. Afterwards, she will magically display no ill affects, act ashamed for further pornographic thrills, and then return to her rapist because she “likes it”—although she will, in the future, pretend at displeasure in order to preserve the fantasy of rape. This is a very common plot-line and not at all out of the norm.

    Well, I apologize for churning stomachs, but I think this serves as a fine illustration that some of the more “extreme” subsets of BDSM are not really about the sexual pleasure of the participants but really are about the use of a woman’s body in a medically impossible or risky way for male sexual satisfaction. The themes of conquering a woman’s cervix via an abnormally large male sex organ is simply the sexualization of the attitude that the entire female reproductive system is the property of men. I simply cannot conceive of it in any other fashion, regardless of it’s in the context of “cervix play” or Japanese pornography.


    1. Sadly, these “cross sections” are not the most disturbing thing I have encountered in the realm of “hentai.” The things done to women in some of those illustrations are too horrifying even to say here. And yeah, the word “woman” is kind of a generous term (they usually say she’s 18, but that’s just so they don’t get busted).

      In regards to the overall post, I have to say my reaction was horrified. That whole “cervical dilation” fetish is frightening enough, but adding BDSM into the mix? Terrifying. I shudder to think how many infections have been caused by that.


      1. hentai is one of those odd cultural phenominon i think has to be viewed through at least some kind of cultural reletivism. i agree with you, much of the more bizzar stuff is… gross seem too ethnocentric, but there are certainly parts of it that repulse me. but then i can’t understand wanting to eat nato either. i do think the japanese fascination with youth, virginity and purity is occationally pretty scary (and mostly makes for discomfort) and sometimes outright horrifying. at the same time, i think there desrves to be a look at the way in which hentai effects rape and child molestation. i’ll have to do some digging, but i recall reading an article that indicated hentai allowed men to have these fantasies and participate in them visually (with drawings, let’s not forget hentai are comic books and animated movies) thus negating their needs to enact them physically. given the overly ridgid and supressive nature of traditional japanese culture, i can almost kinda see it. still majorly squicked by it, and not at all happy with the idea of it, but not sure how to change the fact of it without deciding my way of being/culture is better and therefore the japanese should destroy theirs. that seems like the worst kind of ethnocentrism/narcisism to me.


        1. Hentai, like fucked up porn in the US, is not an “outlet.” Men do not need to rape and molest. It is a repressive culture that causes people to have extreme feelings of guilt about sexual desires, which in turn leads to feelings of fear and hatred. That’s where heinous porn and hentai have their foundation. I refuse to accept the argument that we women have two choices: accept men using disgusting porn (and then trying to act their sick fantasies out on us), or suffer the consequences (rape). Cultural relativism is all well and good for trying to understand different conceptions of the world and different ways of thinking, but it’s got no place in serious moral issues. Hurting people = bad, no matter where you live. Japan’s got a fucking epidemic of sex abuse going on, and hentai isn’t a safety valve, it’s fuel. Do you know that it is commonplace for Japanese women to cry during sex because that is what they think will turn their partners on? Sorry, but that isn’t cool. I’ve got all kinds of love for looking at things from different perspectives (which I can’t elaborate on lest I give away my identity), but it doesn’t extend to giving people a pass for abuse.


          1. “It is a repressive culture that causes people to have extreme feelings of guilt about sexual desires, which in turn leads to feelings of fear and hatred”

            i agree with you on this particular point. it is a repressive culture. and i’m not saying that it isn’t something to look at and consider and ponder and react to. what i am saying is that western culture is not the end all be all, even a utopian western culture void of opression, and as such some kind of cultural sensitivity needs to be exercised when looking and talking about these kinds of extremes. as i said, i’ll have to do some research to look at what studies are available regarding hentai and the rates of reported v/s suspected rape/molestation in japanese culture. since you and i sit on polar opposites of the “great porn debate” any discussions without imperical evedence are just ideology v/s ideology.


            1. so far, the facts and figures are pretty well documented, and they all point to a significant lowering of rapes. given the fact that, in japan, porn hasn’t readily been available save for the last 30 years or so the numbers are very interesting. overall, rapes down. rapes of and by persons under 18 way down. rapes by persons known to the victim way, way, way down. gang rapes, way down. reporting of instances up… way up. trying to find some post 2000 numbers to supliment the studies i’m looking at. but so far, it’s interesting.


                1. i’m not. the numbers seem to be going down as well. which i find very interesting since sexual assault covers more than just groping (point of fact, groping and flashing are covered by a whole other law). it also cover all forms of sexual violence against men, since japanes law only recognizes forced PIV as rape.

                  “Over the same period (study concentrates on 1972-1995 primarily) the incidence of sex assault had also decreased from a 1972 incidence of 3,139 cases to fewer than 3,000 cases for the years 1975 to 1990. In 1995, however, the incidence of reported sexual assaults rebounded to 3,644 cases. Since these figures represent actual cases rather than rates, it can be seen that even the proportion of sex assault cases did not increase. During these intervening years the population of Japan had increased more than 20 percent, from approximately 107 million in 1970 to more than 125 million persons in 1995 (Nihon no Tokei, 1996). Thus, the actual rate decreased slightly from .0292 to .0290 per thousand persons. ”

                  paper in it’s entirety can be found here. as i said, still looking for something that goes past 2000, as the above refferenced does not. but it’s pretty compelling stuff and i think worth a read through. the opening is pretty much on the side of “porn doesn’t increase sexual asault as we can see from several studies.” do with that what you want. but the numbers and research in the body seem pretty indicative of (mostly*) unbiased statistical research.

                  *since i don’t think ANY statisitcal reseach can be called 100% unbiased


                  1. Even if that kind of material doesn’t directly cause rape, I think it must have a negative impact on the culture. I see a lot of anime where “dirty old men” are portrayed as basically harmless in spite of the fact that they’re often groping or peeping at high school girls. In fact, this is often presented as normal and even endearing, and he’s just such a nice fellow otherwise. I hate it.

                    Don’t think I’m only criticizing Japan, though. I can’t tell you how many American men I’ve seen laughing at the antics of those characters and saying, “That guy is awesome! I want to be that guy!” Then there’s characters like Quagmire from “Family Guy.” Everyone says, “It’s just satire, don’t take him seriously, they’re only making fun of people who are really like that!” then turn around and say, “He’s so awesome! He’s my hero!”


                    1. i don’t disagree with you about family guy (was so good for a while… now just stupid and totally without the edge it had) or the way the peeping tom/drity old man thing is seen. culturally, i know japan has a rich tradition of erotic images as a more usual sight and that the crack down on such things really came hard on the western occupation in the 1950s as japan tried to get western/allie money for doing business. given the significant differences in japanese culture, i’m not sure i can honesly say what effect it’s having on morals/morale. all i know are the numbers, all i feel qualified to comment on are the numbers. anything more feels really icky to me in a white-woman-of-reason-and-virtue-i-know-all kinda way.


              1. Well, in theory, isn’t that just REPORTED rapes and sexual assaults? I mean, I know you said report rate had gone up, but there would still have to be a fair portion of people who didn’t report?
                And isn’t the age of consent in Japan considerably lower than in a lot of other countries?
                Just my five cents worth.


                1. The age of consent in Japan is a weird thing. They have two contradictory law systems (much like State/Federal in the US or Oz) where one says 13 and one says 18. From what I’ve read, the one that says 18 generally takes precedence.


                2. it is just reported rapes. the study i was looking at, and refferencing above, showed a marked increas of both reports and convictions. partly, the authors think, this has to do with the kinds of rapes that are happening (aquaintance way down, stranger is now the more common and we know it’s easier to report an unknown than a known), an increase in convictions and an upswing in awareness and help/resources for victims.

                  haven’t found any studies post 2000, though i did find japanese statistical data from their police. and it looks like there was an upswing in reported occurences (a sizeable jump from 1995-2000 of 1500 cases to 2200 cases but a steady decline since then). but the conviction rates are still really close to reporting rates. not sure what caused the swing since i lack analysis or how it relates to population growth or if there was a big influx of forign tourists (generally considered to be more at risk). still looking for something that says/shows an upswing in rape and sexual violence as tieable to the relaxation of obesenity/porn laws. everything seems to be showing numbers that have droped and stayed well below pre-1972.


                    1. i haven’t been able to find any stats that are broken down that much. can you post a link or refference? might be a good cross refference to other stuff i’ve been looking at.


          2. It is a repressive culture that causes people to have extreme feelings of guilt about sexual desires, which in turn leads to feelings of fear and hatred.

            The repressive culture is itself a product of male entitlement, though. Men use it when it benefits them and ignore it when it doesn’t. As a result, sex is everything and nothing. Men build icons and destroy them, and women are supposed to accept it because men have needs (a term often tinged with a threat).


          3. “I refuse to accept the argument that we women have two choices: accept men using disgusting porn (and then trying to act their sick fantasies out on us), or suffer the consequences (rape).”

            i totally agree! i hate how that’s handed to us as our choice. fuck you!

            “Do you know that it is commonplace for Japanese women to cry during sex because that is what they think will turn their partners on? Sorry, but that isn’t cool.”

            this is truly disturbing. tell me, where did you hear about this? can you direct me to an article or something? i’d like to be able to discuss this with others, but would prefer if i had a more reliable source (not that i don’t trust you). i’d also like to read more on it.


        2. Actually, I feel that this kind of hentai/fetish is one of the exceptions for me- that is, I would not view it through any kind of culturally relativistic lens. I feel the same way about FGM (also called female circumcision).

          Now, I know the two are not exactly on the same level- only one affects women physically. But both affect the way women are thought about, in equally disturbing ways.


    2. Um, sticking a penis in a young girl’s vagina so it goes up the uterus has absolutely nothing to do with BDSM. The fact that you view it as such… well, it explains a hell of a lot. Namely your ignorance on the issue, and your visceral reaction to it.


      1. If some people’s BDSM includes dilating a woman’s cervix contrary to health concerns and her pleasure, then I think my visceral reaction is warranted.


        1. jenn, BDSM ends up as a catch all for every person who engages in fetishistic activity regardless. it’s an umbrella term, and not everyone covered by it should be. i realize this was probably not previously made clear. fetishes, such as described above, aren’t really BDSM though. i can expand on this if you really want to learn something about it.


          1. I agree that that’s true, and I think it’s a problem. There are some things that fall under BDSM that aren’t that big of a deal, but I’m not the one who made up the label. As for these sites, they were BDSM making the claim to be BDSM practitioners, so I took them at their word.


            1. having terms that are too narrow are just as much an issue as terms that are too broad in discussions like this. given that medical play in general, and cervical dilation in particular, re fetishes and thus fall under the umbrella of BDSM only helps convolude stuff. suffice to say, the catch-22 of it effects us all. but i think it’s important to understand the very real fact that a fetish is what you’re talking about here. a really spesific one. and i agree with you, one i find troubling, but also one i think can be looked at as more that just “fucking gross!”


            2. I realize I’m way late to the party here, so if you’re not interested in continuing an old thread I understand and that’s fine. I’ve just been reading some of your posts and found this interesting.

              Lots of BDSM practitioners engage in fetishistic activity, but that doesn’t necessarily make the fetish specifically a BDSM activity. For example, foot fetishes — they’re popular among submissive men, but really, thinking feet are sexy and liking to touch them has nothing to do with submission, and a lot of straight men who aren’t into D/s also like feet (as do some gay men and some women, but that seems to be way less common.) Similarly, medical fetishes are just that, fetishes, and some people who like medical play might have no interest in either pain or power play, and just really get off on latex gloves, white coats, and awkward cold bits of metal. Or they might be into power exchange and pain and use the medical equipment to do hurty things. The fetish crowd and the BDSM crowd often run together and sometimes overlap, so it can be hard to tell who’s who.

              It sounds like you came across BDSMers engaging in a specific type of medical fetish as part of their play. It’s a fine distinction, but at least in my kinkster’s mind it does make a difference.


        2. “contrary to health concerns and her pleasure”

          Not that I think this is any kind of good idea ever at all, but were they actually claiming to be doing things that their partners didn’t want? That would strike me as odd.

          (And yeah, I would find blanket claims that women love their cervixes dilated creepy too, if anyone made those. Somehow I doubt anyone did, but one never knows with the Internet.)


  3. Unfortunately I’m not surprised, but that’s mainly because over the last couple of months, since I first used the word “speculum” on my site, I’ve been inundated with folk arriving there after googling some of the most fucked up speculum related search terms imaginable.


    1. Yeah, my porn series has gotten me some terrifying ones, as has my post about butthole bleaching. I can only imagine what using the word “speculum” would result in.


        1. In my experience, speculum related porn tends to be alot less disturbing than what you see in mainstream. I’ve never seen descriptions such as “brutally speculumised” or “until she cries”, though I’ve hardly been looking.

          Oh, I was wondering (though I probably don’t really want to know), in regards to cervical dilation, how is it done, and how far open do they go? The mechanics of it are beyond me.


          1. I’m happy to say that I’ve got no idea. It wasn’t porn that I saw, but rather websites where people were discussing the practice. I do know that cervical dilation of any kind puts the woman at risk of terrible infections, and hence it shouldn’t be done.

            I agree that mainstream porn provides plenty of fearsome fodder for thought, but I’m just as skeezed out by this speculum business because it’s such a creepy fetish. Basically, it fits in with that whole “pervy doctor” genre of porn, in which the fantasy is that a doctor is basically doing things to a patient that can be considered rape, since he’s using his position of authority to get her to allow him to do them. I think the discomfort and fear of the woman that is implied is just as creepy as the bylines for mainstream porn.


            1. “Basically, it fits in with that whole “pervy doctor” genre of porn, in which the fantasy is that a doctor is basically doing things to a patient that can be considered rape, since he’s using his position of authority to get her to allow him to do them. I think the discomfort and fear of the woman that is implied is just as creepy as the bylines for mainstream porn.”

              Hmmm…I hadn’t thought about it like that. Although it seems alot of speculum goings on isn’t with the doctor fantasy, alot also seems to be. And I suppose it would tend to be “him”, women tend to get relagated to submissive nurse status in those kinds of things.


      1. I’ve never seen any “speculum porn” (god, just typing that term is weird) but I have accidentally come across pictures involving speculums- it seems that the whole fetish is based on the idea that well, you can see everything up in there. Compared to other bizarre fetishes, it seems fairly harmless. Of course, I haven’t actually seen the porn, and since I don’t plan to, I guess I’ll never know how bad it actually is…


  4. Inept, unskilled dilation of the cervix (even by medical personnel) can cause an ’incompetent’ or ’compromised’ cervix. This may lead to the cervix being inadequate in regards to physically containing a pregnancy until viability of the foetus – leading to either spontaneous abortion or premature birth. So yeah, it’s not looking good and that’s without all the other shit.


  5. I think I’ve developed a new theory about BDSM. I think it’s restraint. They want to kill women, and the skill/thrill comes in restraining themselves.

    I have a similar theory about standing ovations. A truly heart-felt standing ovation should be a restraint. You’re restraining yourself from running up on the stage and hugging the performer (as opposed to the run-of-the-mill SO’s that you do at the symphony cuz it’s required).


    1. What about women who are consensually involved in BDSM play? What about lesbians who practice BDSM? What about gay men who practice?

      That line just seems like a bit of a blanket statement imho.
      I’ve never seen cervical dilation porn either. Speculum and gyno themed porn yes, but, actually dilating a womans cervix. No. And believe you me, I have spent a fair amount of time looking at ALL sorts of porn.


      1. “What about women who are consensually involved in BDSM play? What about lesbians who practice BDSM? What about gay men who practice?”

        they don’t count. because no female dominant has ever been a bad apple. and glbt kink doesn’t exist. at least, not here…


          1. ND, really? acknowledged isn’t the word i’d use. the idea that there’s more than M/f has been pretty firmly shoved asside with attempts to bring it out into the discussion being either ignored or met with hostility. on top of which, the all male doms want to murdur women trope… really? can we see a touch of even handedness here?


          2. Sorry mang, I didn’t realise that this had in fact been addressed (albeit, I did notice your BDSM study focused heavily on dom(me) male and submissive female) when I posted this comment and if I did I blame la whacky.

            Either way, I still often find it difficult to not include my own experiences when reading stuff – the VERY bad and the VERY delightful. But I guess that’s my own intertextual attitudes/values stemming through as much as my own context. And we’re all on the same side of that. I like to try and see as many sides of an argument as possible before I make up my mind.


  6. Gross? How old are you, eight? You can’t come up with another word, seriously?

    For one, it’s only YOUR opinion that it’s the “worst feeling in the goddamn world” – you most certainly can not speak for everyone. I mean, have you tried giving birth? I’m pretty sure that’s more painful.

    Sick? Wow, you really are intolerant aren’t you. It’s not a personal kink of mine, no, but there’s no need to act so childish about it.


    1. Oh, please. Are you actually defending cervical dilation? What part of “harmful to women’s health” did you not get? The pain caused by cervical dilation for medical purposes is so great that anesthetics are required, because your body is saying, “No! Don’t let that foreign object into my ORGANS where it can cause serious damage and infection!” The pain during childbirth is not the same thing because the body dilates the cervix to allow the baby to pass through it. In a non-pregnant state, the cervix is VERY hard to insert objects into because it is the path into our internal organs. There has to be a line somewhere, and if you think this isn’t over the line, you’re fucking insane.


  7. “you most certainly can not speak for everyone. I mean, have you tried giving birth? I’m pretty sure that’s more painful.”

    Ugh, well you certainly don’t speak for me Charlottee! I mean, have you tried cervical dilation? I’m pretty sure it’s more painful than giving birth.

    You must not have my ***************wiring***************.


  8. In regards to the pro- dilation squad and their brethren in all those BDSM threads: It must sadden them that they can’t plausibly defend murdering women by claiming they, as women, enjoy being murdered and how dare you judge them!

    You know they’d try it if they could only figure out a way. . .


  9. “Although, maybe, just MAYBE there could POSSIBLY be someone who would enjoy this, although I very strongly doubt it. ”

    I’d say there probably are. I wouldn’t say this is a good thing. For anything that exists or can be imagined to exist, there’s some human somewhere who likes it or fantasizes about it.

    Not that this makes it any kind of good idea.


  10. I love this blog. And I’m glad you’re talking about these issues in a sophisticated way, not merely saying ‘whatever happens between consenting is all right.’

    I agree that cervical dilation is disgusting.


  11. I have a lot of things I could say, but I’ll contain them because after reading these comments, most people on here could never understand what others (or I) think.

    There are opinions for both sides of the argument, and as they are opinions, they should be respected. Attacking, provoking, yelling, etc, is immature no matter from what side it comes.

    I’m “into” BDSM, and am fairly new to it. Yes, I have marveled at cervical dilation. Will I ever do it? I have no idea. Would it hurt? I’m assuming yes. Do I like pain? Yes, I am a masochist. Would I like the pain of cervical dilation? I don’t know. I have had 3 children, and one was delivered naturally, sans pain medication. Did it hurt? Yes! Would it be the same with cervical dilation? I don’t know. Are there risks associated with cervical dilation? Certainly! Infection and tearing are major risks.

    I have not managed to find anything that states someone has succeeded or attempted this particular fetish or S/M act. I am curious about it though, and how it went, the pain level, etc.

    Also, in regards to rape/rape fantasy, there is some thought (and I do agree with this in some instances) that the woman actually went through a rape or molestation at some age, and her wanting to recreate that “experience” with someone she trusts is one of her ways to “deal” with the experience. The human mind is interesting, unique, and complex.

    Also, I do defend that what happens in the BDSM and fetish world should, by all means, be either SSC or RACK (you can Google those). I do not condone the including of children, animals, or dead people (necrophilia). But, between two (or more, or less) consenting adults, who have these desires – yes, it is acceptable.

    One last thing: tolerance. Figure out why I say that if you haven’t already. Your pleasures or not others’ pleasures.


  12. “Your pleasures or not others’ pleasures.”

    This was about cervical dilation, not doggie style versus whatever.

    I’ve had my cervix fucked with twice. Once for an abortion (which, due to awesome conservative-state laws, I had to undergo sans ANY painkillers, and it was awesome) and once during rape.

    Bruising the cervix, and/or dilating it when it doesn’t want to be dilated, causes intense abdominal cramping. My insides hurt for three months each time this happened. THREE MONTHS.

    Don’t say we need to “tolerate” this kind of “pleasure.” Dudes (or ladies, I suppose there could be lesbians out there doing this) who cause THREE MONTHS of discomfort for women and/or give them internal infections aren’t something we need to “tolerate.”


  13. Talking about gay men – who don’t generally speaking have a cervix of course, so not sure why they were mentioned in the context of this post anyhoo – somebody told me once about a gay male porn star who is famous for being penetrated with extremely large (we’re talking full size fire extinguisher) objects.

    He’s completely faecally incontinent of course.

    Now some people may find it sexually arousing seeing others have actual bodily harm caused to them. But I’m going to stick my neck out and say it’s wrong.Even if those people ‘consent’.


  14. Search Twisty’s blogs for mention of cervical cauterization, if you want more evidence that fucking with cervices =/= pleasure.

    I recall the following phrases being used: “I vomited. I passed out twice. I screamed. I thought I was going to die.”

    Sounds about right. I can second that, and mine wasn’t even cauterization.

    Wait, that sounds like it would be right up the BDSM alley, too. I guess it isn’t too shocking that there exists “cervical play” (Ceiling H. Cat, kill me now for even TYPING that, any of that).

    Also, polly, seconding the ‘UH, WHAT’ and waiting with bated breath. Or … not.


  15. Well it was just what someone told me, but I have no reason to believe this person to be a liar. And it would be an odd thing to make up.


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